Poetic aerial fireworks warning labels

The warning labels on some aerial fireworks boxes read like poetry. Here are a few of my favorites from this past New Year’s Eve.

Fireworks warning label from Phatom Fireworks' "Bada Bing! Bada Boom!" — Fireworks warning label from Phantom Fireworks' "Bada Bing! Bada Boom!"

Warning

Shoots flaming balls and reports

Carefully read cautions on side panel

Aerial fireworks performance label — Performance label details what to expect from these aerial fireworks

Performance

Panoramic red, green and blue

bursts, accented by sizzling streams

of crackling extending out in all

directions.

Aerial fireworks performance description — Another performance description for aerial fireworks

Performance Description

This 500-gram cake is a giga-gorgeous show of white tails

to white glitter alternating with golden comet tails to golden

glittering willows. The finale is quickened whistling tails to delayed

sparkling and red and green crackling palms. 38 shots.

2 thoughts on “Poetic aerial fireworks warning labels”

Hee, I’ll have to remember “giga-gorgeous”!
Also, there is something about the combination of “Shoots flaming balls and reports” that reminds one of “eats shoots and leaves,” don’t you think? Combined with the picture on the box, the associations could be quite upsetting.